STITCHES Doll Project

Lisa Taton's newest doll is not part of an exclusive, porcelain collection. Nor is it a throwback to the Beanie & Cecil doll she played with as a child.

Appropriately, one of its cloth feet is anchored in a prescription drug bottle, the other, in a red Sharps box, used to dispose of hypodermic needles.

The cloth face bears a cheerful smile, symbolizing hope, the body, a funky sundress, representing the optimism and zest for life which burns so brightly within its creator.

Recently, "Faith" joined several similarly dressed dolls in a small back office at the Midwest AIDS Prevention Project in Ferndale.

Soon, AIDS advocate Candice Moench, MAPP's deputy director, hopes to raise the funding to take the collection, dubbed "Stitches, The Doll Project" on the road.

"We wanted to do something only (and) for women," said Moench, who co-founded the project. "Something that would promote healing. But our goal is two-fold. We also want to create awareness of the issues that face women with AIDS.

"A lot of people still think you have to be an intravenous drug user to get AIDS. That just isn't the case."

Taton, for example, who is HIV positive, was infected by her husband Ron, a hemophiliac who contracted the virus as a result of his exposure to a contaminated blood supply. Ron Taton died on Christmas Eve 1992.

"I like the idea of a living memorial," said Taton, a Ypsilanti resident. "We have the AIDS quilt, but that's for people who have died. This project tells another side of the story. Plus, it's something I can participate in, not something someone will make for me when I die."

Project organizers, who buy the Bendi dolls for $3 each, have sent out approximately 75 to infected women throughout the nation. Return postage is included. The women are then asked: "If your doll could talk, what would she say?" Participants can respond by decorating the doll and/or expressing their feelings in writing.

Some dolls come back with nothing to say.

Moench's favorite? One that is totally naked, except for words written in barely legible ink print -- "I am tired of feeling sick." It was created by a woman who died shortly after submitting her doll.

"It's not pretty. You can see that she really felt stripped of just about everything but her pain," Moench said.

So far, six dolls -- all in various states of dress or undress -- have been returned completed.

"It's a tough thing to put together," said Kathy Gerus-Darbison of Sterling Heights.

Gerus-Darbison, AIDS advocate and co-founder of the Stitches project which was launched last September, also speaks from her own experience as a woman living with AIDS.

"It makes you think about things you'd rather not face," she said.

Like Taton, Gerus-Darbison's first husband Michael, a hemophiliac, succumbed to the disease in 1992, after he was exposed to contaminated blood products.

Her doll, titled "Bound," sits with knees drawn to its chest, bound with chains atop a black velvet box. A tangle of colored embroidery thread serves as hair, a red AIDS ribbon replaces the doll's lips, and before her sits a small open box. In her arms is a beautiful blonde doll.

The doll is naked, vulnerable, except for the ever-present BIOHAZARD symbol on her back. The nest of hair represents her many moods, fears and feelings. The mouth speaks of AIDS awareness. A small angel pin at her shoulder represents the people who love, support and nurture her. The figure in her arms represents her daughter "who has witnessed everything."

The velvet box signifies the bed where HIV entered her life. The red box is filled with Michael's ashes and a bloodstone, representing hemophilia.

In addition to giving women with HIV and AIDS a forum for having their voices heard, Moench, Taton and Gerus-Darbison hope the project raises awareness regarding the disease's real and ever-present threat.

Although the number of people dying from AIDS has declined during the past several years as a result of improved medication, the number of new infections each year remains constant.

"I think a lot of people, especially young people, think `Oh well, if I get it, I'll just take drugs,'" said Taton, a consultant for the HIV/AIDS prevention and intervention section of the Michigan Department of Community Health. "The point I wanted to get across with my doll, is that drugs are no fun."

In addition to resenting her dependency on them, Taton must also deal with the nasty side effects.

"Let's put it this way, there was a time I knew every public restroom along the highway," said Taton, who currently takes three drugs that target her infection, and four that combat side effects. "The other thing about taking drugs: They provide you with a daily reminder of the disease. They really make you feel tied down."

Individuals interested in sponsoring and/or decorating a doll can contact MAPP at (248) 545-1435, Ext. 20. MAPP is seeking corporate and individual sponsors to purchase display cases for Stitches and underwrite the cost of converting it into a traveling exhibition.